This is gonna be a thread--specifically for @stunlovesyou--and it’s about finding and KEEPING inner-peace. It’s not gonna be for everyone. Really it’s just for Stun, cuz he gives so much and I feel like giving back.
>>>>>>>>INNER-PEACE THREAD<<<<<<<<
First off, WTF is ‘inner-peace’ and why do I think I know anything about it?
Well I asked Google and the Wiki definition is surprisingly accurate.
...I was glad to see it described exactly how I imagined it in my heart, like: "Being chill with shit even if it's chaotic or crazy or stressful or even DANGEROUS where you're at..."
I mean we've all felt plain old peace... Down at the beach alone, or lying in bed, or swimming underwater… But INNER-PEACE is hard to find. And it’s even harder to keep!
So why the f*ck would I know anything about it?
Well it goes like this:
I was raised in North Sac in Cali it was a hard-ass place & my mom finally moved us to a tiny town in the PNW. I was pissed to move! I was grumpy. I hated Walla Walla. Took me a year to realize the town & folks were nice and I was the 1 w/ an attitude problem.
This corn-fed country boy walked up on the city bus & asked me if I had a problem. I was shocked! I told him "naw I don't got no problem" and he introduced himself. he said "I looked mad all the time". I realized he was right.
I was mad all the time!
I realized I still had a hard attitude because my old hood was so hard. When i thought about it--the town and the folks were hellla nice--so if I just dropped my grumpy act I could enjoy myself.
MY 1ST TASTE OF INNER-PEACE!
I don't want this thread to literally be as long as a novel... So I'm gonna use bullets and footnotes too get us to the tools at the end. I figure I had to introduce myself somehow, and now that's out of the way, here's a few more details:
✅I was still full of internal rage (& insecurity) all the time
✅Eventually I started drinking & smoking a lot of weed to cope
✅Up til recently I only ever had super-toxic romantic relationships
✅I let my relatives adopt my kids when my 1st marriage ended & they betrayed me.
Now Stun,
I'm really writing this thread cuz I feel some kind of kindred spirit towards you. Somebody shared that damn'd 'house of wine' clip, and I got curious... And I was like "oh SHIT, this dude is a trip!"
I notice people are in awe--and--that they're need as fook...
...then one day you replied to a comment about Blues music & we had a quick back & forth...
And I thought "raised in the 40s" meant you were old.
Man was I wrong! I realized 2 things:
You're prolly younger than me. (I'm 44)
and you came up in a hood harder than mine in sac!
So suddenly I could relate to the combination of ultra-kindness and hard stand-offish-ness I see you project onto the timeline.
You've mentioned:
✅getting drunk
✅suffering mass trauma
✅hints of hella female troubles
✅insomnia and depression
...and I'm sure there's more.
I found @PsychSavant and hired her. She taught me to stop bashing myself. She said "when negative thoughts come up say 'CANCEL' out loud, and then say something nice to yourself but make it convincing." I stared trying it and it worked. I was saying "CANCEL" all day! It helped.
Shari taught me two other main things:
✅Replace the words "I need, I must I have too" w/ "I'll be happier when, I'll feel better when, It'll be nice when..." This cancels procrastination! The inner-rebel teenager is still in there. If you imply "he must"... He just wont.
So my guess is you worked like the Grand-Champ Work-a-Holic w/ gov't contracts---acted poor as hell cuz your from the hood---and now your set for life... but you still got demons hanging around... Waiting you out, costing you sleep... and all that shit.
i.e.
no "Inner-Peace"
I was going crazy in my 1st marriage. She was BPD. It cost me everything to get out of it (even my kids).
So Stun... Here's some tools I've found useful to get that inner-peace. For me it's about that "ah-ha" moment on the bus. I was carying things I didn't need. They'd served me in Del Paso Heights, but they were hurting me in Walla Walla.
(not to mention that this is compromised by the fact that you are filthy fuckin rich--so--everyone is fascinated and trying to mask their desperate greed and begging you to show them the secret to a few million-millions.... Imagining that they'll be happy if they get it.)
✅Vent my aggression & stop stuffing my anger. How can I do that?! she said to write angry messages, but don't send. If that doesn't work? Go someplace safe & scream until you lose your voice... Still mad as hell? Get a whiffle bat and attack your bed until exhausted.
The woman is a genius... And a psychic too. She's retired now, but she uploaded hella videos to her youtube. They've helped me go back and remember other things she taught me. Maybe check her out Stun? The "shrinking shame" video is amazing.
Okay man.... I'm sorry this is so long. I really didn't think it would go on and on like this... But I'm not gonna stop. Here's a few more things that really helped me find and keep that calm feeling just under my heart--you know?
I've recently met this woman @bethmartens. I met her through a dude named James @jarue369 and he'd told me about this book that I tell everyone to read now... It's called "PEOPLE OF THE LIE" and it explains why people act evil. It really makes it click. M. Scott Peck wrote it.
So I felt drawn to Beth, and I was reading her stuff sometimes... And I had her as a guest on my show (#RxOnlyPICTURESHOW), and after that I bought some of her services and she showed me the amazing RELEASE technique. Here's the jist of it:
So I've been doing this like 3-4 times a day ever since I learned it... Why?
Because it gives me that inner-peace man!
LOOK:
Ever since two years ago when my relatives burned me and started keeping my kids from me... I can't keep my head man. I'm pissed & sad all the time
And this RELEASE shit really helps! I mean it f*cking works... Makes me feel lighter and more present and happy in the moment. And not fake too. It's worth it to check out Beth or even to consult with her one on one. She survived cancer twice & found inner-peace. For real!
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